It doesn’t matter!

It doesn’t matter!

 

Honest to God, son – it doesn’t matter!!

So you’re having the drumstick,

great,

enjoy!

. 

There’s no need to correct me

as to whether I said

you would eat

the drumstick first …

or last …

. 

There’s no rules to sweetie eating!

. 

Honest to God, son – it doesn’t matter!!

So you’re wearing your coat,

with the hood taken off.

Its sunny – no worries!

. 

There’s no need to correct me

as to whether I said

you could zip your sleeves

in, or take them off …

. 

Its your coat and your choice!

 

Honest to God, son – it doesn’t matter!!

There are more things to worry on

than sweeties and coats

and more things to correct me on

when you’re older and wiser.

. 

But for now .. let it go – and just trust that I know.

Jenny

I’m sorry, Mr Blonde

I’m sorry, Mr Blonde

 

 

“Oh no!  Not you!”

and as the words form in my head

I know how ridiculous they sound.

For if I didn’t want it to be you,

why set the trap in the first place?

 .

I guess, I just expected

you to be cleverer than that.

Mr Blonde.

 .

I’ve watched you run down the cable

from ceiling to floor

countless times.

 .

I’ve watched you, brazen

as you scan the computer desk for crisps

wash your whiskers and sit on the phone.

 .

I’ve known you were in the bin

as the dog stands, staring,

not quite believing what he’s seeing.

 .

I’ve found you, red handed,

at night time.  Flattened against the wall

in the bird cage.  Little blonde mouse-shaped cuttlefish.

 .

I guess I thought you were cleverer than that.

Being bested by the lure of peanut butter.

Small blonde body broken in the trap.

I’m so sorry.

Jenny

Musing on disappointment

 

It feels a bit like very hungry

although worse than very hungry

because you know that hungry can be fixed.

~

This can’t be fixed.

If it could be fixed,

it would have been fixed by now

and it wouldn’t feel like very hungry.

~

It feels a bit like loss

although not as bad as grief.

Like when you’ve lost your cardigan

somewhere round the shops.

~

You know there’ll be other cardigans

in almost the same colour

and almost the same style

but no matter how nice, it won’t be that cardigan.

~

It comes in the realisation

that, for two days, they’ll all be there

and you’ll be here

and they’ll all be away, but you’ll still be here.

~

You sigh, because that’s rough.

It can’t be fixed

so lets opt for diversion.

Maybe I’ll go shopping.  *spit*

Jenny