Well friends I am taking a complete leave of absence from the internet for 40 days and 40 nights.
It hit me like a flash last night and I need to do this for myself.
I have to learn to get out of my own way so I can move forward and the only way is to completely change my daily routine.
I will start May 1st and will not be back until the first Monday in June.
ides:
- spring cleaning
- rake the leaves
- prepare the garden for the first time in years
- learn French
- stay away from cafes and head to the forest
- exercise
- take long walks
- spend amazingly spirited time with the kids
- keep a daily journal of the whole thing
- learn to see
- learn to hear
- learn to touch
- be mindfully in the present and out of my mind
- keep moving until I drop
- read at the old people’s home a book
- visit a cemetery and ask them if they could have one more day how would they spend it?
- dance when nobody is at home
- listen to rock music yeah Kev.
- listen to classics too and blues and jazz
- read as many books as I can
- the rest will reveal itself to me as I go along
Why? It hit me with such force as to shake me to the core. As if an angel with strong arms hit me on the back and zapped me with so much passion to do this that I could not dismiss this. Today people go to the North Pole or climb Mount Everest or Trek in Nepal. But I figure I can withing a certain walking radius of my house in the mountains achieve the same thing and the cost is nothing. I know this is the right thing to do and I have a feeling it will change me. For the good I hope.
I couldn’t just disappear so I decided to inspire instead and not make you worry. I have deep gratitude to Miki with Kev’s support to thank because Miki made me see the anger, the frustration the hopelessness in my eyes in my birthday video — she said to paraphrase her it was as if I was not there mentally and she was right. I know I have many years ahead of me and have to learn to get out of my own way and to learn how to get to where I want to go. I want to leave a legacy for my children and to set an example and although I would love to take the Pilgrimage in Spain its out of the question so I am doing it right here from my front door. There’s a whole world across from my house a massive forest with lakes and rivers and trails nobody ever walks on. I have never seen this but here the wolves at night and see the dear come out on the cul du sac at night and am in awe. I have never experienced absolute silence where I can hear myself breathing and my heart beating.
Yes I also got this image of a world we live in where we are all so busy we never take an exploration of the self like this. I may be poor but that sets me free you see to do this from here.
As of tomorrow I will begin and see you all in June. I will have stories to tell and sketches and photos so wish me luck break a leg hahah.
Don’t give my spot away Miki and Kev. I won’t be gone long but long enough to find whatever. The mystery of discovery is what is so damn exciting.
Lots of Love from a fellow Cafe Cremer,
Michael
tracked back to my blog






















